Respect for Time.

Respect for Time!

Now I realise that this is an age old discussion within the work place, within relationships, within individual encounters in social interactions and at home.

Yet, I find it imperative to bring it up again. Respect for time is not something that we as adults want to be chatting about, discussing and dissecting in a time when it has been spoken about and killed as a subject.

But I find that as we proceed with caution, trepidation and much fear into a world filled with diverse cultures within the workplace - time management, puntuality and a lack of respect for people's time, has become really prevalent in a seriously negative way.

People seem to love the new excuse of "this is my culture", that is why I am late, do not arrive or will even give you the courtesy of knowing that I am not attending a meeting or function.

When did we as human beings become so disrespectful that we believe that we can use our beautiful cultures and traditions as an excuse for our disgusting behaviour. There are millions of people who have similiar if not the same cultures who do not use their inability to respect time, as an excuse.

I am so fed up with the nonchalant way that some business people have become so blase' in their rude approach when they do not even arrive on time for conferences, professional work functions and meetings.

Since when has it become ok, to be rude? Since when has it become ok, for us to sit in anticipation for someone who does not have the decency to pitch up? And for the life of me, I cannot understand why people are afraid to speak up and tell the person that it is not acceptable!

Now is the time to get over the nonsense of rolling over and accepting lower standards. Now is the time to stand up for what is right. Now is the time to take charge of the way our professional teams interact with each other, guide and support each other to become more effective.

Time is a precious gift given to us in this world. No-one knows how much time we have or when it will run out.

Being thoughtful and caring towards someone else's time shows that you respect and honour them as a human being.

When you arrive on time for a get together, you show your own dignity and respect for yourself. Of course there will be times when you have an emergency or a valid reason why you cannot attend a meeting or function. In those times, it is imperative to phone or contact the person/s and let them know that you are not arriving. This allows people to make alternate arrangements, go ahead with the meeting or dinner or even replace you with someone else.

There is thoughtfulness in liaising with people and this leads to trust. To honour someone elses time, is to give them the ultimate acknowlegement that they are important to you too.

After all, they have made space in their lives to include you. It just makes sense to respect people in the way they wish to be respected too.

Some pointers to consider for future interactions that allow you to be on time:

• Confirm the date, time and venue in anticipation of making it on time.
• If you are driving, leave at least a half an hour before you are due to arrive, just in case you run into traffic.
• Be prepared at all times.
• If you are in the office and are heading to a meeting, be prepared beforehand. Have your documents ready, speech prepared and double check the venue of the meeting.
• Be polite to people that you are talking to and let them know that you have to leave to be on time for the next person.
• Be strict with your own time and people will respect you and your own time too.
• Do not get side tracked by emails, telephone calls and conversations whilst you are heading towards your next appointment, get together or meeting.
• When you are going to a personal function or someone's home, arrive on time if not a little bit earlier.
• When people prepare for you to come to their home, they usually go all out and anticipate your arrival with excitement. To arrive on time makes them feel that you care. That is so awesome to build and deepen the relationship with trust and respect. Very cool
• If you cannot make it for some reason or due to an emergency, then be thoughtful enough to let people know before hand.
• Phone, email or send a message in advance if you are going to be late too.
• Invest in others and they will invest in you. Trust cannot be bought, it is earned. So strive to be trustworthy.

And last but not least, have fun doing this. Challenge yourself to be on time. Challenge people around you to see who gets to meetings first - create a fun, reward system.

Remove negative excuses and do not accept complacency from anyone who uses it too. Life is too exciting to be stuck waiting for someone who does not respect you or your time.

Also, remember that life is filled with surprises. So if there are times when you really do not or cannot make it on time, then do not stress. Unexpected weather, situations and moods may attack you just to create a little excitement in your life. The important thing to remember is this...people remember your integrity as a person when you communicate with them and are upfront about what is happening so that they are able to adjust their own lives.

I personally appreciate it if I am told in advance or even at the time if a person cannot be on time. This allows me to do something else, concentrate on what is important or adjust my day accordingly.

People and their time are precious. Let us all take heed and look for ways to acknowledge it and be on time from now on.

Here's to being on time. :)

Fireworks and Diwali

It is now that time of the year when everyone has had a hectic year. From debt repayments, to no income, to some income to success for many people. There is a sense of euphoria as a tough year winds to a close and people are starting to get into party mode.

The celebrations are beginning as everyone anticipates the close to a great year for some and a financially challenging one for others. The bond that remains for everyone though, is in the fact that each day brings us closer to Christmas and the much anticipated holidays.

With that in mind, Guy Fawkes seems to be one of those special November celebrations where you can have mindless fun. Who knows why this day is so famous when some guy tried to blow up Parliament, but it is a holiday nontheless. One which entails much partying, blowing up of fireworks, burning of scarecrows, banging on the neighbors house door for money and much mindless fun for kids. The fact remains this. On this day, which is not religious, no-one has a challenge with anyone blowing up fireworks because it is reminicent of Mr Fawkes blowing up or attempting to blow up a building. Who knows why that is significant to South Africa, but it is. So we celebrate it. People sedate their dogs, are mindful that their animals are safe and go out to greet or growl at the kids that knock on their doors.

Then comes Diwali, which is of huge significance to Hindus around the world. A day that signifies the end of Terror (Note it is when the Devil was defeated - hence Hindus have no hell and no devil to be scared off), and the lighting of fireworks is meant to signify the destruction and scaring off, of evil spirits, bad energy and Light conquering Darkness (Good conquers evil).  It is also our New Year. Much like the Chinese, fireworks form a significant part of the destroying of darkness and the welcoming of light. I have not heard any complaints about Chinese New Year, yet it seems that Diwali being a Hindu religious festival is the main focus for South Africans to focus on for the wrong reasons.

Now let me explain myself further, before many people vomit, throw up or regurgitate their anger on me. We are a family that love dogs and animals. Let me give you some perspective. We had growing up, 27 dogs (many rescued from the circus, from the Free State farms and off the streets), we also had tarantulas, snakes, an iguana, scorpions, fish and lots of birds. We are a family who not only love but respect all animals.

Even in the predominantly Indian areas, there is a vast majority of people who do not celebrated Diwali and they own pets. The difference between them and the people who complain, create an uproar and throw tantrums, is that they know for an entire year that Diwali is about to descend upon them and they take the necessary precautions to safe guard their pets from harm.

See, the way I see life is this. We all have choice. Sit in your lounge and complain or do something about it. Destroying traditions is not the solution. Complaining is not either. Take a stand the right way.

I also have nothing against any religion or religious beliefs, but I do have a tendency to get pissed off with animal abuse from anyone!! I personally do not light fireworks that have big bangs, but do love watching them when they are set off at the stadiums, during Diwali on the beachfront and on New Years eve. I personally make sure that people are aware in communities and via word of mouth about the significance of making sure that animals are either sedated or taken care of during ANY time that fireworks are being used for any festival.

During the World Cup celebrations, fireworks were used everywhere. There were no designated areas or restrictions. During New Year celebrations, people become over enthusiastic in all areas and shoot of fireworks in their drunken state towards vehicles, people and animals. That is just disgusting. But no-one does anything. Police are scarce and even afraid of doing something themselves. I do not see huge headlines, warnings or patrolling of the various suburbs where people insanely burst fireworks without care for others.

With that in mind, it is now bordering on harrassment when neighbors send police to my house because they saw a Rocket launched into the air. One baby rocket mind you. Not a big bang, not a scary noise maker, but a colourful explode mindlessly in the sky with beautiful colours one, lit by a visitors child.

Now I take umbrage to being harrassed by a neighbor who still calls us Coolies (very backward mentality), calls the fire brigade because we decided to cook in our own backyard, for the underprivileged street kids (ps..it is easier to cook for 200 people in a massive pot on the fire, rather than cook on a stove) and then he also proceeds to state that we are disturbing the peace and tormenting his dogs emotionally (the same dogs that he physically kicks and whips to stop barking).
Now the true significance of Diwali is lost in the stupidity of people who come out of their worm holes long enough to make phone calls of harrassment and then disappear. These are the very same people who also write anonymous letters of disgust for Hindus.The very same kind that do not take the time to learn about other peoples religions or languages but are happy to stereotype everyone in their path enmasse. The very same type of people, who keep asking me to convert to Christianity to save me from the devil. For their information, I do not believe in a hell or devil and am quite happy with my beliefs that all religions are there for the good of mankind.

I am not religious! I do not even force my spiritual beliefs on anyone. I believe simply in being good and kind and to respect the people that I see, than to pretend to respect a higher being once in a while.

People will be up in arms around the world if I had to blatantly say that Christmas should be banned because I do not believe in it. After all, it is one of thee most significant days in the Christian calender - the Day their Saviour was born. Before anyone balks at that statement - I do believe in Christmas and its deep significance for people. As Hindus, we are taught to respect and understand all religions. We are even taught lessons from the Bible.

In the same breathe, it is equally as disgusting and unacceptable for Hindus to be told that we are devil worshippers and are going to to hell if we do not embrace the Christian religion. That is uncalled for, against human rights, beliefs and individual choice. Asking for the banning of fireworks instead of the increase in awareness of Adults is much the same. How about we focus on being more careful and thoughtful of people and animals rather than focus negatively and demean an entire religious celebration. Come on people. We have enough access to information, media, internet and real people so we should be more mature in the way we behave towards each other.

I am tired of being called a heathen and idol worshipper. If you as a person are so backward in your beliefs that you will fall for any bullshit that is spun then good luck to you. I came onto this earth free of a language, religion, beliefs and thoughts. My awareness of life is from my upbringing. Which in essence, means that I was spoon fed a belief system. Whether I believe in it or not is not the issue. What I DO believe, is that at the end of the day, no-one has a right to force me or others to follow what they were taught.

Religion was made by man. It is a set of rules for mankind to follow so that they can achieve various spiritual levels. I will not deny anyone their beliefs nor profess to be a guide for someone who wants to achieve this. It is a personal journey. It is one filled with choice.

All Rights to this photo belong to the Creator (Anonymous)

With that in mind, I feel that if I want to burn fireworks, then as an individual, I should have the brains to realise that it will affect my fellow human beings with the noise levels and that it is scary and dangerous to animals who are not taken care of. Hence my thoughtfulness in making sure that I take extra precautions and go to areas where it is acceptable.

I will not however, condone people who use fireworks irresponsibly and hurt animals without thought. I will not accept children being hurt from lack of supervision. I will not stand by and watch an animal in pain because of the repercussions of the misuse of fireworks.

But I will stand up for the right to use fireworks responsibly because I truly believe that it signifies the conquering of Good over Evil. I love the colours, the comaraderie and the beauty of Diwali. I love the sense of family, thoughtfulness and joy that can be seen on childrens faces. I love the significance of welcoming a new Year into the Hindu calendar. I welcome the lessons and love that is taught and re-instilled on this wonderful day.

But above all, I welcome all people to join with an open mind. I welcome people around the world to take precautions for their own pets on this day, in the same way that they do on New Years and Guy Fawkes day and Fourth of July.

Let us be adults and find solutions. Not remove an entire religious day due to the lack of understanding from some people.

Here is to a powerful celebration where Knowledge wins over ignorance. Good over Evil. And seriously!!!! We have no devil..so leave me alone.

I welcome all threats, disbelief and whatever else tickles your fancy.

Until we meet,

take care and have fun!

Arthie Moore

Religion..dare I go there!

I have thought about this for a while and have finally concluded that I have a right to express exactly how I feel on this subject.

I know that it might rile a few nerves but then again, I cannot make everyone happy. This post is merely my take and impression on religion. The one thing that can make, break, heal and bring either war or love to mankind.

So here goes...the reason for my ramblings began with another one of those experiences where I could either laugh or cry with frustration at the madness of some people.

I am personally very spiritual. I do not believe that I need to advertise my own personal beliefs or go to any specific building to prove that I believe in a higher being that has given me the gift of life. I believe. That is all the explanation that is needed.

So my take on religion is this...Religion has been created by Man as a set of rules for Mankind to achieve various spiritual experiences. Many will debate this, but I welcome open thinking. Maybe if women were involved with input or their thoughts with some of the scriptures...there might be a fairer view on some of the lessons involved.

Anyway..I enjoy going to Cathedrals and sitting in a quiet pew, feeling the awesome heavy stillness descend upon me. Something I do not experience anywhere. I love going to the Hilltop in Inanda to experience the joy of the Shembe people when they celebrate with their haunting music and slow, rythmic dancing. I enjoy going to the Bhuddist temples to revel in the calm, gentle spirituality that exudes from the solemness of the meditating priests. I enjoy going to the various temples to witness the beautiful comaraderie between the gorgeous temple goers of the various Hindu faiths. I love meditation when I feel like doing it. I love breaking fast at Passover with my Jewish friends and celebrating the end of Eid with my Muslim ones. I also support and join the journey of my friends during Lent.

So in simple terms..I love and respect all religions. I strongly believe that everyone has a right to worship or not in the way they believe is the right way for themselves. It is a very personal journey.

Hence this blog. I have been feeling a bit riled up by the recently increasing forcefulness of various individuals who have deemed it their duty on this earth to convert me. I do not feel the need to profess an undying devotion to any particular religion to make it easier for people to understand me. It is my personal journey and will always be so.

It is just frustrating to be told continiously that the Devil is living in me and that I am going to hell if I do not accept a certain religion. Now I love alot about that religion, but the Devil does not exist in my wonderful world. As for hell?? methinks it is the best manipulative thought to have ever been created.

I mean, why fear going to hell when you die, when we are creating the worst type of hell on our precious Earth right now whilst we are living and breathing.

We are a continent of people who are currently murdering, raping, killing, stealing, hurting, damaging, demeaning, de-moralising and destroying our fellow human beings and Mother Nature..What is worse than that..pray do tell?

What can be worse that the wars that are starting using the name of religion in vain? That is mankinds greed, envy, gluttony, pride, hatred, anger etc..

How about we each as individuals, use the amazing teachings our religion or personal beliefs teach us and strive to make this world a better place right now, right here, in this moment, without advertising our religion.

How about we drop all pretences and really, truly accept and rejoice that all human beings deserve a place on this earth. That the word diversity encompasses different ways of thinking, understanding, wisdom, knowledge, mannerisms, experience, wants, needs, hopes, dreams, feelings and above all individual choice.

Each person is perfect as they are and their beliefs in religion or not is perfect for that person too.

So my plea to the really, over excited converting types..leave peoples personal choice of religion to themselves. Stop forcing something that was intended to bring love and hope into the lives of people and changind it into something that is compulsory and hurtful if one does not choose that path.

Let us all start to respect the people we can see in front of us right now, instead of professing to be holier than everyone else.

As far as I am concerned..if a person is comfortable to believe in devils and hell..then that is their choice..please keep it close and leave me alone. I do not wish to enjoy any religion through fear of what could happen. It is already happening, with our racism, prejudices, paedophiles, pornography, bad behaviour, underlying gossipping and backbiting. If anyone can prove to me that there are worse things than that in an afterlife..then I am willing to listen with an open mind.

Until then..love the beliefs that you choose and keep it sacred!

Making Memories..

As a society, we have been taught to work hard, play hard, earn money, buy things, aspire to have the biggest car, best home, provide the best education for our children and to have the perfect life.

All the wonderful things you can have and achieve if you want to and if you dream big and work for it. But is that all that there is to to life?

I look at people everyday who live in informal settlements, who take a bus to work, they do not have the latest technology, contract phone, flatscreen tv or even a fridge filled with expensive food. What they do have is a life filled with awesome memories.

Sure enough, they are worried about where their next meal is going to come from, when they will be able to get a home that has solid walls, where their next income will come from and whether they will ever get out of the slumps of living in squalor. But speak to anyone of them and ask them if they are happy. Truly happy as a family. Many will answer with a resounding yes. Yes they are happy that they have their family with them. Yes, they are grateful for the plate of food they have because they are able to share it together. The point being that they are together. They are families who pray, eat, drink, talk, laugh, cry and share everything together.

Compared to the people who are striving and working so hard to achieve the best for their families, but at the end of the day, are so tired that they miss out on the essential and pivotal moments of laughter and growth in their own children.

I was thinking about how little time we make to create the very memories that contribute to who we become as adults. You know those memories, like when your dad read a story to you or when you got washed away by a freak wave and your mum hauled you out and became your hero. The love that grew in those moments can never be replaced by the obscure memory of when you got a new playstation or watched tv all day long.

Nowadays, we are just content to buy the latest gadgets for our kids and shower them with inane gifts to cover up our guilt for not spending quality time with them. Toys are there to be ooohed and aaaahed over for a paltry 10 minutes then launched into the -to be forgotten - box.

Whatever happened to us letting go and encouraging our kids to take a walk with us in the afternoons just to feel the wind in our hair and count the number of red cars that pass us by.
What has happened to us that we have forgotten to be spontaneous enough to jump into the car on a school night and go the beach, grab an ice cream and meander aimlessly to soak up the gorgeous night lights and stars whilst listening to the crashing of the waves against the endless sleepy sands..

Memories do not just live in the form of a photograph. They live in the deep hidden recesses of ones heart, mind, body and soul. It lives on for an eternity, ready to be pulled up suddenly when triggered off by a song, touch, thought or gentle reminder.

We feed off our memories in times of joy, pain, sadness and love. We thrive on their very existence to add to our own lives and how we choose to live it.

In our darkest hour, we haul up the best memories - mainly the ones that did not cost a cent to create - to help us heal in our time of need.

Think about it...when we die..as we are all bound to..what memories will your children, spouse or family have of you? Is it ones where they reminesce about how hard you worked and the beautiful home (or debt) you left behind or will it be that you loved them with all of your heart, being there when they needed you the most?

My aim is to create memories where I listened to them when they spoke, was thoughtful in my giving, spontaneous in my random acts of fun and spending time and money on adventures. Even though it may not be the latest gadget or toy, the fun interaction is thoughtful and more meaningful in its giving and excitedly recieved by all that I interact with.

Children are not interested in how much money you can spend. They are interested in you as a person. They are sitting there waiting in impatient anticipation for the knowledge and wisdom that you have to share with them. Make life an adventure of discovery. Plant a tree with your kids, take a walk, lie on the grass, play in the rain, embrace life in its simplicity.

After all, making memories is free. It does not take money..it takes something more precious than that - It takes your time.

So live each day as if it is your last and make it meaningful to you and the very people around you that you are working so hard to provide for. Give them your time!



Play in the park..Just Coz..it is fun to do so..

Play in the rain..be rebellious and let your inner child shine..

Howl at the moon..or sit outside with a mini picnic at night...nature has a gorgeous way of inspiring us with her beauty..lets take advantage and revel in it..!!

until the next time,
take care and have fun!
Arthie Moore

Technology. Our excuse for not Listening!

Removing our Facades!

It is really incredible to watch how social media has created a fantastic platform for business growth as well as friendships. Linking people who would never have had the opportunity to meet in this lifetime. The power of using it well allows you to boost your business, network with a click of a button without having to cold call, build your own confidence, make millions, create virtual products and become famous..or not.

Without achieving much or having any real people skills, you can have more than a thousand friends. Many of whom you will never meet, talk to or know their life stories. Some, you will connect with and start a momentum of fun and insane banter or build a really awesome friendship with.

The downside though, is that we have stopped interacting in a face to face social environment. What you see on the internet or cyberspace, is not who you really are in person. People who are normally introverted in real life, become fun party animals on their profiles.

It is scary then to consider, that we are now falling in love with facades. More scarier than that?..is when we start to believe those very facades that we create for ourselves as being real.

Maybe, we are scared of socialising with real people and find it easier to build friendships via social media because it is easier not to get hurt that way.

Mixit, Facebook, Myspace etc..has a huge following for a simple reason. In our attempt as human beings to keep up with technology, we have stopped looking at what is in front of us. We are lonely and do not know how to connect with people right in front of us.

The power that social media gives to you, is the ability to remove someone from your life with just one click of the delete and block button.

As I sat contemplating the way that the youth are fighting boredom, it occured to me that as adults, we stopped caring..As simple as that. Even as adults, we have been projecting our own inadequacies and fears upon our own families and children. We have stopped listening and stopped talking.

In truth, we have stopped embracing our hummaness. We protect ourselves so much and have created such a huge defensive layer around us, that we do not know how to take it down anymore. The facades are now glued on and we now falsely believe that it cannot be removed.

In the same way that it is so easy to create a relationship via technological means, it has also become so easy to break up with someone via email, sms, skype or messaging. Where has our sense of dignity, honour and respect gone to?

We use, abuse and blame technology for not pitching up to a get together, for cancelling an important event, missing a party or forgetting the people in our lives, who count on us to be there in their time of need.

It is also becoming more and more difficult to stimulate our children with all of the technology just waiting to be embraced by our little ones. So in our attempt to live our own lives of fun and socialising, we throw nintendo, Wii, playstation, X-box, laptops and cellphones at them and hope that they will keep quiet and stay out of our way.

We have stopped listening. We have stopped interacting. We have stopped connecting on a human level to the very people we created and brought onto this earth. Our excuse? Technology.

We do not use technology as a reason to build relationships. We use it as our excuse to not connect, support, guide and be with people in the flesh.

I have also found that some young people are learning to speak differently and in code. Their pain is very real. Their fears deep. Their dreams huge. Their vision limited. Limited by the lack of real people to guide them through an integral time of their lives.

Yes, sure there are technological geniuses amongst young people. But they are few and far between. Most of them know how to use their Blackberrys in ingenius ways, use Youtube to promote themselves, create incredible websites that generate income and use social media to improve their popularity..but for the rest, there is simply the cellphone with internet access, camera and sms'ing to help them keep up with the fast pace evolving around them.

For the shy, introverted, kids in pain, their ability to chat to anyone in a social media environment, can either make or break them emotionally. Most feel or get some comfort, some may feel more isolated.

Their code has been created to block adults from understanding what is really going on, because no-one seems to care anyway to crack that code. Mixit is huge for a simple reason in my eyes. People, especially young people, are able to connect and talk and be listened to via the cheapest method availalbe - Cellphone.

Facebook is huge for another reason. It allows people to create any persona they want. They can put up thee most insane photos, videos and updates that will give them the attention they crave but do not get in real life.

Can you imagine a world where encouraged others to shine in their true selves? That is why Mindpower, Self Empowerment, Transformational programmes, Positive thinking and Freedom techniques exist.

We are in desperate need to find ourselves again. To find who we really are. The person hiding inside waiting to come out and be seen.

If we do not know who we are, how do we expect teenagers and young people to use us as inspiration or a role model? Which facade are they supposed to emulate?

The latest trend seems to be our ability to hide emotions, feel nothing, not hurt, show that we don't really care, when we do and to be nonchalant in the face of sadness.

Are we using such a powerful tool in the form of internet, as an artificial balm to soothe our inability to feel? Are we so averse to embracing emotions that we hide behind technology?

My solution?

Create a balance. Stop long enough to notice the living, breathing, human being right in front of you! Use technology to enhance what already exists. Focus on reality. Reality being the person who needs you to hold their hand in this moment. In this lifetime - treasure your time, this human form we were given should not be wasted. Hug your child. Read to them. Write a love letter. Take a walk. Listen. Talk with thoughtfulness. Talk with care.

When you next create an update, make it positive, uplifting, real. When someone is in pain. Inbox them privately and seriously show them care with your words meant to help them. Don't update to show the world your cleverness. Be genuine. Be kind. Be good.

When someone says, that you do not understand them - make a concerted effort to come down to their level of understanding instead of brushing it off with an inane joke or assumption that it is not worthy of your time. You could save a life!

With your partner, look, really look into their eyes, see their pain, feel their emotions, connect with them. Relationships last alot longer when you take a walk and listen to what is really going on. An sms is cool, as long as it is a follow up to a real conversation. Stop hiding behind one liners. It may be funny now, but later down the line, it becomes a nasty habit that can break relationships.

You never know how much a person is hanging onto your every word, your tone, your body language and more importantly, your sincerity or lack thereof.

Be gentle with your words. Let everything you say, have the intention to build the person.

Emails are awesome! Talking a person even more powerful. Words in writing don't always project exactly what you meant to say. This creates mis-understanding and a mis-interpretation of meaning that can cause an issue in many instances.

With young people, share your wisdom by sitting down and chatting - FACE to FACE! Most people feel mis-understood for the simple reason that we don't care enough to ask. Ask what is worrying them, what makes them sad, what their hopes and dreams are, what do they want to achieve. Just listening will take them a long way to figuring it out themselves anyway.

Young people are energetic, have clear thinking and access to every form of technology for the logical stuff. They will work out stuff eventually. Experience however, will prove a huge boost in their life, if we could lend them our wisdom through conversation. Guidance not domination is the key. Let's start caring more for others rather than our cleverness in getting people to Like us. Let's be genuine in our interactions and figure out how we can start to grow people who still read, think and appreciate a life filled with integrity, hope, honour and dignity in the true sense of the word.

Morale of the story? Connect in a natural way - stop hiding behind technology!

Your life story is important. Share it in a meaningful way. Mentor someone. Guide someone. Look and actually see. Listen and actually hear what is being said. Drop the facades and start to feel. Welcome a world filled with everything that is real whilst embracing the positives of technology. Find a balance and begin to impact our world in a powerful way. Leave your own legacy!

Tolerance

I have been struggling recently with the word "Tolerance". How can you tolerate people and everything that makes them special? I think that the operative words could be "understanding" and "respect." 

That way, we do not limit ourselves into falsely believing that we are tolerating people for the sake of appearances. Respect and understanding means that we have a choice to accept that every single human being is different to us, but we do not have to change to become them.

It opens us up, however, to possibilities and the ability to explore their differences with an open mind, kindness and dignity.

Someone recently told me that they accept diversity..I asked them how? Their answer spoke volumes... "I tolerate the people that I interact with!"..

This conversation has been bugging me. It is not unusual to hear someone say that they tolerate someone, a circumstance, a behaviour, a culture, a religion etc..but why was it so disturbing to hear it now?

Maybe, my awareness has changed or my consciousness is different, but it actually pissed me off. Why do we as human beings, profess to tolerate some one, if we do not like that person. Is it because we not have the guts to stand up and say it out loud or has society deemed it more appeasing to circumstances not to rock the boat by "tolerating" people or situations.

Where is it written in this world..that we have to like every single person we meet? We can stop being hypocrites and walking on egg shells now. It is time to say things clearly, stand up for what is right and speak with integrity. Doing the right thing even when people are not looking.

Whatever happened to the Mind Power and Positive thinking guys who say that you attract to you the type of people you want to surround yourself with..and to run from negativity.. Never lower your standards to fit in with the crowd who expect less from life than you..Think positively and stand up to tyranny is the latest.

How then do we do it with a clear mind filled with integrity, if we blatantly and quite happily say that we tolerate people who are different in some way or the other.

We are all born as babies, who are literally spoon fed our sustenance, our way of thinking, our beliefs, our religion, our language, our thoughts, our ways of being..In other words, we are all born innocent of anything..a clear slate, waiting to be programmed.

The fact that we are all born that way should count for something. We should all acknowledge gratitude for being born innocent, then accept that we were given a life filled with amazing experiences based on our upbringing.

We should then continue that gratitude for the fact that we were taught a language and religion (a set of guidelines) or not, a sense of culture, tradition, idiosyncracies, an education, and a brain to think for ourselves. All of these experiences can either limit us or grows us.

How then, if we were ALL born with a clean slate did we get to the point of believing that we are superior to others based on our different experiences. Should we not be harnessing the very essence of these different, mind challenging, unusual and thought provoking experiences and sharing it with each other instead of saying that we tolerate each other based on these very uniquenesses.

Just because I pray or not, in the same way as you, does not mean that my life is limited in abundance, flowing with love or lacks laughter. Just because, I do not speak English in the way you believe it correct does not give you the right to say that you tolerate my nuances and incorrect use of the language. Just because I do not act, behave, prance, dance or celebrate life the way you do, does not make me any less as a human being..

Maybe, just maybe, if you look closely, you could laugh at the mis-pronunciation and ask me how I would say it in my own language and learn from me. Maybe, just maybe, you could lower your judgements and attend my celebrations, delight in my exquisite cuisine, dance my mad dance, love and laugh the way we do..to understand and respect me in the way I wish to respected.

Maybe, just maybe, you could change the word tolerate to respect and thereby find a common ground of understanding that can only help us to grow together in a powerful team of unique strengths that can absolve most weaknesses. Because maybe, just maybe, my thought patterns being so different, may bring an amazingly different wisdom to the world that will help to heal, rather than destroy.

It is incredible to relieve yourself of the burden of having to tolerate people. If you do not like someone, maybe your beliefs or values do not resonate with them. So choose not to spend time with them, but that does not mean that you have to tolerate them. Everyone is searching for the elusive respect deserving of them.

Many people do not give it. It costs nothing and everything. Yes, it is earned, but at the same time, if you feel that you deserve it, but do not give it, does not mean anything when people respect you through fear or because you deemed it appropriate based on your position or status. They just might be tolerating you too.

My thoughts on this subject? Be true to yourself and the people around. Start embracing change, it is so refreshing. Open up and let people into your life and remove the barriers that are preventing you from experiencing the true person and not the facade you see everyday. There is an incredible depth to everyone you see. If you take the time to actually listen, explore and join them on this fabulous journey called life!

Here's to less judgement and more understanding..

"At the level of Respect, All people are Equal!" Brian and Arthie Moore

Arthie Moore

www.celebratinghumanityinternational.com

www.kileadership.com

www.arthiemoore.com

Cooking on Expresso Show - Butter Chicken Curry

I recently had the good fortune to cook on the Expresso Show live on SABC 3.

I was asked to cook a Butter chicken recipe, which I created and sent through immediately. It was tons of fun and exciting but totally different to what I expected. Eish, I have new found respect for Chefs who cook live.. :)

So for all of my awesome friends and family who wanted the original recipe that I had created for the show, here it is! enjoy..

Butter Chicken Recipe

Served with Basmati Rice, Sambals and Pappaddums

2kg/tray chicken pieces with bone
4 Cardammom pods
2 Cinnamon sticks
1 tablespoon - Crushed ginger and garlic
3 bay leaf
Half a teaspoon of Cumin.
200g Butter ( I won’t use all of it)
3 tablespoons of Butter Ghee (essential)
Tandoori paste (4 tablespoons)
1 whole onion chopped (does not matter how you chop it)
1 tomato grated - Normally the skin is left after grating..throw it away.
1 teaspoon Salt  and Pepper (adjust according to taste)
2 tablespoons of Mixed curry powder
1 teaspoon of Garam masala
1 teaspoon of turmeric powder
1 cup of yoghurt
250ml of fresh cream
1 cup of frozen peas (optional)
Coriander  to garnish.

Method:

Score the chicken. Marinate the chicken with salt, pepper, ginger, garlic, tandoori paste, then pour over the yoghurt and allow to rest for 20 minutes.

Heat a casserole pot, put in the butter ghee and half the butter. Add the onions and the cumin, allow to cook for a few minutes, then add the garam masala, turmeric powder and mixed masala. Allow the curry powder to cook for a few minutes then add the grated tomato. Add the bay leaves, cardamom pods and cinnamon sticks and the chicken with the marinade. Stir and allow all the ingredients to mix properly, cover and let it cook over medium heat.  

It normally takes about 20 minutes depending on how much chicken you are using.

To finish, add the fresh cream, adjust seasoning ( add peas in if you like at this stage and switch off the heat) and put the remainder of the butter.  Give it one last stir. Garnish with coriander and serve.

 Side Dishes will consist of the following:

Sambals:

One onion chopped into tiny squares
One tomato chopped finely into squares
2 – 3 chillies
Coriander to garnish
Lemon juice
Fine salt

Mix the chopped onion, tomato and chillies and coriander together and season with fine salt and lemon juice.

Pappadums:

Can be fried in a frying pan with a little Sunflower oil. This takes a few seconds and has to be done at the end.

Basmati Rice

Cook Basmati rice as normal and serve as a side dish.

ps..for those of you who want to watch the recording..here is the link:

Butter Chicken Recipe